What He Lost
by Alpha-Akera
Summary: Sesshomaru lost something that he thought he could never get back...how wrong he was. ONE SHOT


Disclaimer: I own NOTHING

What He Lost

A Sesshomaru Fanfiction One-Shot

Inuyasha and the others could only stare at Sesshomaru's crumpled form as he leaned against the tree. This tree was as special to him as the tree that Inuyasha was pinned to for those fifty years. This was the tree where Rin had first found him.

Rin. The name alone brought a sting of pain to his chest as he thought of the young human girl that he came to love. He sighed to himself as he thought of that day in the meadow after he had saved her from those monks who had wished to return her to a human village, despite her protest.

**-**Flashback-

"Umm… I was wondering Lord Sesshomaru?" Rin asked, as she ran her hand over a gravestone.

"What is it?" Sesshomaru responded, turning his attention towards her.

"If I died one day, I was wondering. Would you…would you always remember me?" She asked him, a small smile on her face as she traced the name that was written on the small stone.

Sesshomaru looked down at the small child, his eyes widen but he quickly composed himself and replied to her, "Don't say such things."

-End of Flashback-

Sesshomaru gripped his chest where his heart was. He felt it breaking all over again as he thought of what happened just a few days later.

-Flashback-

Rin was off gathering flowers for Sesshomaru, while he rested looking at his brand new left arm and his new sword that had emerged from him. Jaken was by the fire looking with pride and wonder as his lord inspected his sword. Sesshomaru then heard a sound that made his heart stop and his blood run ice cold. It was the sound of Rin screaming. He rushed off in the direction that he had smelt her blood coming from but he arrived too late.

He stopped and looked at the child that he loved more than anything in the world laying dead in the middle of the pathway, her flowers that she was bringing for him still clenched in her small hand. He smelt Naraku's scent on her and growled low to himself and cursed Naraku for taking the life of someone so innocent. He knelt down and gently pulled Rin into his arms, Jaken beside him crying silently as he felt his lord's sorrow and pain. Sesshomaru then brought out Tensaiga and tried to revive her like he had done before when the wolves had killed her. But no matter how hard he tried, she wouldn't revive. She just lay in his arms, her small body once so full of life now lifeless.

Sesshomaru knew that if anyone could help him figure out what was going on it was his mother. So he lifted Rin gently, while instructing Jaken to grab his tail and lifted them into the air with his cloud as he headed towards his mother's palace in the sky.

His mother looked up as she felt her son approach her. She knew why he had come and even though her face didn't show it, her heart was breaking that she was the one who must deliver such horrible news.

'This will break him' She thought to herself. 'Naraku knew just what to do to break Sesshomaru.'

She looked up and sighed as he looked at her, hope hidden in his eyes as well as sadness and despair for the child that he had lost. She turned her eyes from him and spoke the words he didn't want to hear nor was he expecting to hear.

"You have already brought her back once with Tensaiga. A living thing can only be brought back to life once using the sword." She spoke, clenching her eyes so that she could not see the pained look on his face as he received the news.

Sesshomaru felt his very soul and heart shatter within him as his mother told him that there was no hope to save his child. He lifted his head and let out a pain-filled howl that was carried by the wind causing many demons to look up and wonder what had caused one so much pain. But the only one who knew the extent of the howl was Inuyasha.

Inuyasha and the others stopped, Inuyasha dropping to his knees as he gripped his chest as the howl reached his ears. His friends kneeled beside him, each wondering what was wrong. Inuyasha looked up into Kagome's eyes and said softly, "That's Sesshomaru; he's filled with such pain and sorrow Kagome. Rin is dead. Kagome, my brother is calling out for his remaining family telling them of his pain and of his loss. Kami, this will kill him."

Kagome felt tears running down her cheeks as she held Shippo to her as he cried into her chest. Kagome looked to Miroku and Sango who were crying as well, Sango's head in Miroku's shoulder, his arm around her waist. Kagome looked back at Inuyasha, "We must find him Inuyasha. We cannot leave him alone." Inuyasha nodded in agreement and sent out an answering howl to his brother, telling him that he was coming and that he understood his pain.

Sesshomaru heard his brother answer and felt comforted that his brother had answered his call. He turned from his mother and lifted off of the ground to head back to a place that held special memories for him. His mother held out her hand to try and console him but she knew that she could do nothing to ease his pain. Even her guards looked after him with sad eyes as his grip on Rin never lessoned as he left his mother's palace.

He arrived at the place that held such special memories to him in record time. Jaken peeked out from behind his lord and gasped. He knew this place. Jaken felt more tears come from his eyes as he realized just how much pain his lord must be in. Sesshomaru had brought them to the place where he had first met Rin. He lay down at the foot of the tree, Rin still in his arms as if she was just asleep. This was how Inuyasha and the others found him.

-End of Flashback-

Inuyasha and the others could only look at Sesshomaru as he held Rin close to him, a hand gently petting her hair as if she was just taking a nap. Inuyasha made his way forward to try and console his brother but Sesshomaru's demon came out and growled at him, Inuyasha immediately backed off not wanting to incur his brother's wrath.

"I thought he called you here to help him, Inuyasha? Why is he acting like this?" Miroku asked as he looked at the once proud demon lord.

Instead of Inuyasha answering, it was Kagome. "Its cause he's in so much pain, his blood is just reacting to his pain. Even in her death, he is still going to protect her." The others just looked on with both sadness and pity as Sesshomaru leant down and nuzzled Rin's head, whining as if he was expecting her to wake at any moment.

It took a few hours for them to get Sesshomaru to allow them to get closer to him. Sesshomaru refused to let Rin be buried in a human village, so they buried her at the trunk of the tree where she had found Sesshomaru. Even after she was buried and Miroku had blessed her, Sesshomaru refused to leave the tree. Inuyasha and the others did not want to leave him in such a state, all fearing that he would do something that would result in his death. Kagome waited for nightfall then she asked Inuyasha if she was allowed to go home for a bit. When Inuyasha asked Kagome only replied that she had a feeling that she needed to go home that night. Inuyasha understood but told her to take Kirara with her, as he did not want to leave his brother. Kagome understood and went off in the direction of the well.

As she entered her home, her mother was there in the kitchen with a small box lying open on the table in front of her. Kagome said not a word but looked into the box and saw Rin's kimono that she was always seen wearing. Kagome looked up at her mother as she ran her hand over the fabric that was old and torn.

"So its true isn't it? What I feel is true?" Kagome asked small tears in her eyes.

Her mother nodded her head and replied, "Yes dear. You are not the reincarnation of Kikyo. You are in fact the reincarnation of Rin. The Shikon Jewel held Kikyo's soul and it was passed onto you through the jewel."

"And you knew? How?" Kagome asked.

"Because after Rin died, Lord Sesshomaru sought to surround himself with humans, our ancestors, in order to fill the huge gaping hole that loosing Rin left him. One of our ancestors had come across a room that Sesshomaru was going to give Rin on the day of her sixteenth birthday. Inside the room where many dress kimonos and the finest jewels in the world that Lord Sesshomaru had collected for Rin. The servant asked Lord Sesshomaru about the room and Sesshomaru answered in a quiet voice that it was to be for his mate when she reached of age. Years passed and no one asked Lord Sesshomaru again about Rin. But soon it became apparent just how much her death had affected him. After only living for twenty more years, Sesshomaru followed Rin into death but not before leaving all of the possessions that he had gotten for her to our family." Kagome's mother took a shaky breath before she continued. "When you were about four years old, you began to ask me where Sess was. At first I didn't understand but after about three days of hearing your cry out for him, even in your sleep, it hit me. You were looking for Lord Sesshomaru. But I had to be sure. So the next day, I brought out some old things that we have had in the family for many generations. One of those things was a haori that Lord Sesshomaru always wore. It was demon made and had not deteriorated over the years. When I brought it out, your eyes lit up so bright Kagome and that's when I knew that you were she, you were Rin. You slept in the haori for a few years after but one day you came to me and asked why you had this that you didn't remember it. I knew that something had changed that day but it wasn't until you first went through the well that I realized what had happened. You were not meant to be Rin when you were in the past because Rin already existed there but now that Rin has been killed you are now needed. Kagome you must become Rin, I know this is going to be hard for you Kagome, but you were always meant to be Rin."

Kagome was in a state of shock. She gently reached into the box and pulled out the haori that was Sesshomaru's. She lifted it to her face and inhaled deeply.

'It even still smells like him.' She thought sadly to herself before she spoke aloud. "What pain have I put him through all those years? He will surely never forgive me." She said as she fell to her knees, clutching the haori close to her and crying, no longer able to hold in her tears.

Kagome's mother knelt down by her child's side and took her face into her hand, causing Kagome to look up at her with tear-streaked eyes. Kagome's mother just smiled gently and placed a kiss on her child's forehead as she held her close.

"He will never be angry with you my dear. You are his mate. He will love and cherish you until the end of your days."

"But I am but a human. I shall die many years before he does." Kagome answered, looking up into her mother's smiling face.

Her mother gently kissed her forehead again and whispered into her ear. "You will know the answer to that when the right time comes. You must have faith in yourself my daughter as I have faith in you."

"I love you mama." Kagome whispered as she hugged her mother.

"I love you too my child. Now hurry you must return to the past and help Sesshomaru through this. I trust Inuyasha understands how you feel?"

"Yes mama. We have discussed it and discovered that the love we feel for one another was only the love between a brother and sister."

Kagome's mother smiled and helped her daughter up, hugging her once more. "Now go and get ready my child. You're destiny awaits you, your true destiny."

Kagome smiled and ran up the stairs, the haori gripped tightly in her arms. She returned thirty minutes later, dressed in a dark purple kimono with Sesshomaru's haori wrapped around her. She took comfort in having his scent surround her. Her mother, brother and grandfather were all standing there at the end of the stairs, all smiling at how she glowed. Kagome's mother took out a choker necklace that held a crescent moon charm on it, an exact replica of the one on Sesshomaru's forehead. She placed in onto Kagome's neck and the charm came to rest in plain view for the world to see. Kagome hugged her family, promising to return as soon as she could. And with that she bid her family farewell as she made her way into the well house. She clenched her fist and took a deep breathe before smiling to herself as her hand came to rest on the charm around her neck. She closed her eyes and jumped into the well, letting the magic engulf her.

Kagome stepped out of the well and steeled herself as she got back onto Kirara and gently told her. "Take me to them Kirara." Kirara purred happily and jumped into the air, heading toward their group. They arrived just as the sun was coming up and Kagome gently got off of Kirara. Silently she walked into the camp, ignoring Inuyasha, Shippo, Sango and Miroku as they looked at with curiosity. She stopped a few feet in front of Sesshomaru and took out a small knife that she had concealed in her kimono belt. She closed her eyes and made a small cut in the palm of her hand. She then raised her hand, palm up towards Sesshomaru and waited.

Sesshomaru sniffed the air and blinked. He looked at Rin's grave and sniffed close to the dirt but the scent was not coming from there. 'I smell Rin's blood.' He thought to himself as he sat straight up more looking around frantically for the source. When he caught sight of Kagome, he stopped moving all together his eyes focused on her hand that was held out to him. 'There! Its coming from there!' He rose with such speed that it looked like a blur as he grabbed Kagome's hand and brought it up to his nose. Inuyasha made a move to stop him but Kagome shook her head at him and told him with her eyes that she knew what she was doing. Inuyasha and the others didn't understand but they trusted that Kagome knew what she was doing.

Sesshomaru did nothing but smell the blood that was coming out of the cut for a few moments. His eyes widened as he looked up into Kagome's face as she smiled at him and nodded, answering his unspoken questions. It was then that Sesshomaru noticed the family necklace around her neck; he had been saving that for Rin when she was old enough to become his mate. He then noticed the kimono Kagome was wearing and also the haori that was identical to his very own. He knew that Kagome was from the future as he had overheard her and Inuyasha speak of it.

He closed his eyes and tears came from them as he brought Kagome's hand to his lips, licking the small cut clean of blood and then nuzzled into it. He looked into Kagome's eyes again and his heart started to beat again as he saw the love and devotion that Rin's eyes had always held for him.

"Rin, you came back to me." He spoke, his voice carrying through the clearing as the others just watched and waited.

Kagome smiled and nodded her head. "Yes Sesshomaru-Sama, I came back. I am sorry for making you wait so long for me. But there is something you must understand Sesshomaru-Sama, in this life I am called Kagome not Rin. But my feelings for you have not changed."

Sesshomaru pulled her close to him, his arms wrapping around her waist as he looked deep within her eyes. "Whether you are called Kagome or Rin… My feelings for you have not changed. I love you, very much."

"And I love you too, my Sesshomaru."

The End


End file.
